Day 72. The mid-retreat lull from days fifty to seventy comes to an end as we enter into an exploration of patience (khanti parami). The ‘far-reaching’ attitude of patience has a quality of deep ease and contentment with and in this moment.
Patience has no sense of anticipation. It is allowing of whatever is here now. It is trusting that what is unfolding is fundamentally OK.
We may worry that if we are “too patient” we will be excusing or condoning unacceptable behaviours and conditions, i.e. “putting up with” abuse, oppression, systemic poverty, war etc. But this worry gets us ahead of ourselves.
Patience, infused with honesty (sacca), relaxes us into a steady calmness that is curious. It sets aside “me” as the centre and observes the fullness of what is unfolding, from all points of view.
Each moment, we regroup (remember or remain mindful) observing the movements of mind (thoughts, feelings, sensations). When we are triggered and the mind is reactive, we can notice that we are moved to action by a “me” that is craving or hating.
To whatever degree patience is present, we reduce reactivity and confusion. We become a more reliable agent for meaningful change.
The practice of the perfection of patience is a steady attending to and allowing of ‘what is’ that simultaneously recognizes the interdependent nature of all phenomena, the ceaseless play of causes and conditions.
Within this play of causes and conditions, we act with as much skill for the future benefit of both ourselves and all beings (without exception). There is no ‘us’ and ‘them.’
PRACTICE EXAMPLES: Today I will notice what triggers my reactivity. I will cultivate contentment — with some dedicated quiet time, allowing myself to rest in silence. Recognizing the peacefulness of contentment, I will extend it to ease my reactivity when I notice I am triggered.
